It also feels incredibly patronising, and it doesn't matter who it comes from.

I guess it's because I never seem to get asked "what can I do to help this thing happen." The assumption just is that if I cope then I am fibbing and if not, then well that was stupid of me. For some reason I do find more people just try to stop me than offer real help that they would, frankly, offer to someone they understood to be well.

It is also really hard to say, hey, I'm doing a job, it's not selfish of me to want to do this. You're welcome.

So thank you Eva, Thank you Sarah, for saying "I will do this."