feeling down
May. 10th, 2004 06:28 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
frualeydisYesterday evening/night was bad. I was clumsier than ever, knocked things over and hit my elbow on one of the door posts and it hurt like hell. Then I couldn't take off my socks myself and I just cried and felt thoroughly useless. I mean, what's wrong with me, since I can't even give birth to this baby? I looked up what one of the books says about being late and it says: "Cheer up, even though you pass the expected day, 9 out of 10 babies are born within ten days after that date." Well that was yesterday so now I'm not just late, but also some kind of freak. So I cried and agonized and Rickard got tired of me, but I really feel like a useless failure and people calling, apparently getting very disappointed that I haven't managed to get the baby out yet, doesn't make it easier.
This afternoon my girls will come here after a week with their father and even though I've missed them it will make it more complicated, because I have to be reasonably happy and if labour starts their father will have to come and get them. It would have been much easier to have the baby when they were at his place. But I don't think there will be a baby this week either. Or ever.
This afternoon my girls will come here after a week with their father and even though I've missed them it will make it more complicated, because I have to be reasonably happy and if labour starts their father will have to come and get them. It would have been much easier to have the baby when they were at his place. But I don't think there will be a baby this week either. Or ever.
